You Know It Has Been a Good Workout When…

  1. You finish last, but nobody notices because everyone is on the floor. Dead.
  1. By the time you know where you are, a resurrected person is kindly stripping your barbell.
  1. Coach looks at you as if he’s deciding whether to say, ‘well done’, or just to call an ambulance.
  1. You vaguely remember your own name, but only because everyone around you is saying it, preceded by, ‘Are you sure you’re okay?’
  1. If you’re able to speak, you say the stupidest stuff, like, ‘“Squat” on earth was that?’

  1. Coach tells you to write your time on the board, and it takes both hands to hold the pen steady.
  1. You return home and can’t remember what you’re supposed to be doing with your life.
  1. You pull yourself up the stairs, praying that the bannister can withstand the weight of your weary glutes.
  1. You groan like an old person as you get into the shower, and decide that your hair can go for another day, because it really isn’t worth it.
  1. You are motivated to eat a big, ‘healthy’, balanced meal, immediately followed by all the crisps and chocolate and ice cream…Has your stomach become a bottomless pit?
  1. You catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, and wonder where those muscles came from.
  1. You feel strong. Okay, you still have to take care walking down the stairs, and remember not to sit cross-legged (or they’ll stay that way!). You roll your eyes at the person who says, ‘Why do you do this to yourself?’ But you know that you’re going to ‘do this to yourself’ again, and again, and again…
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